11-04-08

“The people who cast the votes don't decide an election,
the people who count the votes do.” --Joseph Stalin

Old man or Yes Man. Could be worse aint that right ya
Red shirted commie? Go vote before you get slapped in
your never good enough baby face.

Good news though I am going to sell this pic I took earlier
this summer. Who can't afford insurance naaaaaow old man?

Living in the past isn't good for anyone, I know. But for the love
of shit I miss summertiming. No excuses. 2009 is going to be so
full of fun we are gonna get constipated until laughter explodes out
the ass of everyone I know. BUUUuuuufffffmnnnng.

10-28-08

“Young people don't know what age is,
and old people forget what youth was” --Proverb quotes

I was just reading how ants can lift 10 to 20
times their body weight. You say amazing?
I say weak. Stop working for the queen ya
dumb little ants.(pic:www.naturalbmx.com)

For those of you who may or may not know, we
have been doing a ton of work to keep the trails
where they are. In doing so, I've learned a ton about
how things work. Three of the most important things to
remember kids: One; Money is king and is all that matters.
Two; The older you get the easier it is to forget what it
feels like to honestly love something. Last: Ya also forget that
giants aren't scary...

Dave is working hard on making the AxelRad shop
as sweet as possible. We might not be able to stop getting
older but we sure as shit don't have to grow up.

Oh, and I think I already had this pic up of Nutter but it made
me say, "oh so nice" three times so posting it two times is still
not living up to its full potential.

10-20-08

You couldn't pour piss out of a boot
if the instructions were printed on the heel.

I got word of this movie from our friends over
at Reign Green. And holy crap is it worth a seeing.
Click on this image and think for two hours...
I wouldn't believe it either but it is worth it.

Janis sent over some pics that Robbo's girl took.
Totally Tubular Toss. Speaking of Three T's

Three Mac has been ripping lately. Of course, one could
only assume Marky went to McDonalds right before this
move. In doing so accomplishing what only few other can
One sweet Four Mac.

Eat it man. There are new Spin Doctors in town.

10-13-08

Everybody wants to go to Heaven
but nobody wants to go now

So I got kidnapped and thrown into the back of a van. Blindfolded.
Walked into a room. Blindfold off. The walls were white, ceiling and
floor as well. Two men stood before me. One in tattered clothes.
No teeth. Long beard. Smelled of good times and whiskey. The other guy
had slicked back hair. Gucci suit. And a wallet the bulged out his pocket.
A voice echoes through the room and said,"beat up the one guy you
would bet will come out on top. No matter what struggles laid before
him, he would find a way to be happy and do whatever needed to
be done to get what he wanted."
Which one is it I thought? Just then the two men charged me
and beat the ever living piss outa me.

AxelRad spent the last of its advertising money on this milk carton.
Seriously. October 13th. C'moooooon.

You probably don't know that you like Reign Green yet... but you will.
(rider:sean-pic:someone better than me)

10-10-08

Have you ever imagined a world with
no hypothetical situations?

It's a good feeling when people get together and do something
for no other reason other than it's the right thing to do.
Big ups to the woods men.

Sometimes there is no reason for things that happen. All you can
do is pray to the Big Man upstairs and know for a fact
that a dude as sweet as a giant number one foam finger made
of sugar and tough as the meat neck waiving it, cannot, and will not
do anything but come out on top. Praying for the fast recovery.

I feel like I just spent the past week in a dunk tank full of fecal matter
and Nolan Ryan's got a pocket full of quarters buying up all the balls to
hit that drop target. Well screw you and the rest of the Astros Ryan. It's
the weekend and I have a feeling its gunna be one of thooooose one.

10-06-08

How does one pilot a stone temple?

I don't know much about life, but the one thing I have
learned along the way is sometimes you ride the horse.
And sometimes the horse rides you. The thing you have
remember is that when shit hits the fan and you got a thousand
ton beast on your shoulders, you don't give up and say,"shit man.
I got a thousand ton beast on my shoulders." You stand up and
run that mother fucker into a glorious sunset.

Bulldog Bike's own Clipper was at the contest we had this weekend
for 13 point 5 seconds and ran away with first place on the jumps.
Give it up to Clipper. Never scared of heights and always on the edge.

Abe has become so familiar with mud butt, the wet course didn't scare
him what so ever. Rebar, lime, boards, mud, flame thrower and rocks
and a real mustache tude all went into the pic before you.

Thanks so much to the companies who gave parts, the bands that played,
the donated money and anyone out there trying to make shit shine.
Dave King came in second behind Mitch on the invisible half pipe. But I
had to show this absolutely amazing picture. I mean, my God, just look
at the strength of that tree. ho ha hoooooooooooya.

9-29-08

Their was this boulder on top of a mountain
just about to fall...

Welp two thousand and eight was a great year for the trails.
We are on taking the necessary steps to preserve the place
which unfortunately means a shut down till the land owners
paper work the crap outa things so all the little weiner-less
sue jerks can't do a thing to them. They told us they will fine
anyone down there. That is the least of your concern. Please do
not blow the trust we have built with the landowners and ruin
what could be years of good times. Sometimes you gots to take
one step back to take two steps forward.

Wow, being serious is a burrito wipe butt. How do jerks make
it through a day? This weekend we are having an event to raise
money for the needed fence. Saturday we go to an undisclosed
location to rage... and rage hard. Let's get together and start
the backbone to a creature so full of do not care its laughing
instills fear into every suit, every crayon that stayed in the line,
and every volume button turned down, until they shrivel up wisp away.
A big prost to those who don't lay down. Turn it the hell up boys.

9-22-08

Listen to Slater

For all the shred nar bros out there, ya best be practicing
your pocket airs. Best pocketeer gets a new Mutiny Burlish.
And I know one mean marmite breathed muther that owns
it. The pocket? Ney. A burlish of his very own.
He gots nothing to loooooose.

How many times in the past have you seen a three man
train? Oh wait... that one guy is on a zip line and won't stop
bragging how nobody but nobody can box him out.

Oh and I found this image on the world wide web and laughed
so hard I got sent to Mr. Beldings office. You think that is bad?
It was the college years and Screech was the Vice Principal. oooo.

9-22-08

Necessity may be the mother of invention,
but play is certainly the father.
– Roger von Oech

So like we have been saying the contest is on the Fourth
all kinds of fun, all kinds of give-a-ways, thanks to some
amazing companies and people. Free gifts to whatever
girl get harassed the most by Flash (pic:-Gmullen)

To help BF train for the contest we hired some kooky lady
to follow him around and heckle him to death. Preperation
is key when training.

And when Tmac isn't too busy being a television superstar slash
three sixty maniac he trains for the contest also. Like he always
says, "Box em out till me cock falls out." mmmmmurp.

Oh and be sure to go to FBM before you get
off the compoooter. In the land of the blind the one eyed man is king

9-22-08

I wouldn't trade this weekend in for
all the farms in Cuba

Happy but sad weekends. Couple of the boys
flying back to England. Last day of Summer.
Make it count now boys. The time of cold titties
frost bitten whiskey and cave dwellings will be upon us.
Spin at night or spin during the day. Just don't do
anything straight forward.... nothing.

For those of you out there that haven't experienced Camby
ride trails I want you to know it is a sight to behold. Just don't train
too close or you gonna gets the boxed up, hanging from a tree, harpin
it up with the whiteys.

As the seasons change be sure to stay healthy. You don't want
to get yourself some of that Northampton Sinus infection... do ya?

Lots of good things getting together for the Jam on the Fourth.
Bring your costumes. Best Jib moves. And every intention of having
a good time that can fit in your souls. Lots of prizes for those of you
into supporting the trails. Lets do this. Tell a friend.

9-16-08

Hey dare shit tooooth

Well everything is moving, changing, turning and flipping.
Abe won millions on scratch off tickets and was last seen
in Barbados gallaping away with.... BGL perhaps?

Poony was last seen following some crazy dudes and a monkey
so far away from Steelers country he started to dry up and turn
to nothing but a pile of dust. Ohhhh boooner save me.

Joe got slapped in the face by a mannikin. Was last over heard
saying he was looking for a 1980's version of Tom Hanks so he can
discuss what to do with someone who had experience in this situation.

And after all of that, be sure that some things do not and will not ever
change. Example. The amount of "shit ya" that comes outa your mouth
while you hang out with Mikey.

Example two: There will always be kids at home working up enough
horney to actually go and do something about it. And their are kids
grabbing life by the gash and finger banging away till they get all
the giggles they can till life gaurd tells em they are going out too far but
it doesn't matter cause all that giggling causes cramps and now they
will drown. guuuuuuuuurrrrgle on fun boyzzzzz.

9-9-08

Fun versus Old shits

A group of men with nothing to lose, got
together and smashed sticks against the ground
until the Earth herself, swelled up and provided
them with a place to do what makes them happy.
And now you think you can take that off them?
With rules and stipulations. Ha...laughable mang.
Bow down to Fun. It will rule the world one day.

Support fun even if it's not your flavor.

Apparently we are in the event planning business here.
Aaagh poor you so many parties and such a weak weiner.

9-5-08

When you look good. You feel good.
and when you feel good. You do good.

I am sad to report the loss of a huge element
in the northeast trail scene today. His memory
will forever blow in the dust and time will not
let us forget how good he was to us all. So today
we say good bye old friend. You will be missed.
The seating Area(2005-2008).

In happier news; Mikey is in town riding out
sweeter lines than most could imagine. Which
is a good thing cause the boy has some embarrasing
tan lines he has to compensate for. Oh no you didn't.

Oh ya and Robbo is in town also. Man oh man can that
boy oh boy make some shapes oh shapes on that bike.
Speaking of Oh's...OOOOOOOOOooooooooAAAAAYA Friday.

9-2-08

stiNksicle

hey Dude your feet are rotten and you're dead,
we could all learn a lesson from this man
poverty and booze can make a comfy pillow
but you will still freeze to death come winter,
you dirty vagrant , you're smelly.

in other news treivel was spotted loving cupcakes
but being shy about it

8-30-08

bElmAR(men off the bikes, off the wagon)

Bob Costas Eats Cocks

Not Chunk though, unless you're payin' a pretty penny.
Chunk doesn't need your money anymore, Props is paying him
enough so he can finally fulfill his dream
of completing the tattooed chess set on his chest.
Anchorman of the Belmar

Paying the judges in booze, reap what you sew, repeat.
Grady Corbit, judge(left)

Who helped built the death trap?

James P. MotherFuckin' Nutter
(in between giggle fits)

Daryl Nau,iron fisted, quick witted and neon clad Co-Announcer

the man behind the meat
Steve Crandall

8-26-08

With fate as malleable as clay

For all you kids out there wishing to get big in this whole
bmx thing take notes on Nutter. Looking to be recognized as "good"
is just a search for inner happiness. Silly kid you can find
that in a cheeseburger. Especially if your Iggy Edgar the meatatarian.

Wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which
one gets filled up faster. The bar is set boys. Are we men
or are we sheep? Perhaps we are just Devo.

Old people need to care less and laugh more. Keep getting soggy ya old
bag. We get brighter every day. Soon we're gonna blind your salty asses.

Johnny's in the basement mixing up the medicine

There is an old Greek story about a man forever punished
by pushing a boulder, which represents his mistakes, up
a hill till it falls over the other side so he has to do it again.
Well I don't know about you Sisyphus' but Daddy need a drink.

This pic of Mario was from last year and I think I already used
it on this site. Well who cares? I'm living in the now even if it
is yesterday. I gots 1.21 jiggawats and a pocket full a do not care.

Nutter is pretty good at stuff. It just sucks that Jane Goodall
won't stop harassing him. She says she wants to fully understand
the workings of the male apes mind. I think she's a nosey nerd.
avoid the noid nutter. avoid the noid.ooooooooooooooooooya.

Edgar is working on his six pack

Just wanted to thank everyone for the help and ideas
to save the trails. After you spend too many years in
a hole you start to get pessimistic about things. It is so good
to get emails from people you never met, caring about things
like this. We still have a mountain to get over so put on dem
boots on boys. can't stop. won't stop. Time to learn a lot about
how the real world works. I just learned how to post a video.
me lurn smash sooooooooon. so gimme want ah want eh?

save the woods trailer from janis on Vimeo.

A rooster crows only when it sees the light.
Put him in the dark and he'll never crow.
I have seen the light and I'm crowing.
--Muhammad Ali

Alright boyz we got in there. Turned our
heads and coughed. Showed our balls,
and walked away with a clean bill of health.
We are having a contest for the best contest
idea. So send any ideas you have for a trail
orientated event to me at whychox@aol.com
Winner gets one night out with Bugby for a night of karaoke.
By the way, this is the first thing that has ever
been true in this news... ever? sshhhhhhhing. ever.

Four outa Seven.

Behold the birds of the air. They sow not.
neither do they reap, nor gather into barns;
and yet your heavenly Father feedeth them.

Put your hands together. Cross your fingers.
Rub a rabbits foot. Step on a crack. Brake a
back. Tick tack paddy wack. God help us. Please.

Bill or George. Anything but Sue. No hetro

I've come to the conclusion that no matter how
hard you try in life your always going to hit a ton
of obstacles. Whether it be insurance, no food or
or your own Mother putting too many layer on ya...

This is an image I made for all the slayers out there
who spent the springtime behind the shovel and
the summertime under an umbrella.
Hang in there Kittens.

Let's do whatever it is we gotta do to make this
weekend not a weak...end. Get it? Weak? ha? all
get your toungue out my ass ol Gary.

Digging for some Fire

Welp, that guy Dylan was dead on when
he said the sun isn't yellow, it's chicken.
So the thing to remember is that when a
day comes along that doesn't suck, mark
that spot with a big ole X.

And this special news update brought to you
by Tmac. "When living a life a slight bit
bigger than a real person remember to rinse
lather and repeat...always repeat." Now go
get out under the sun and ask her where she's been.

America Five, England Nill

Bowie sang "before there was Rock all
you had was God." If that were true, how
the hell is Abe rocking this hard with God
on his side? huh David...huh?

Poppy used to ride with earings that had his
girls name on em. Now his earings just say "kicking
ass" on one and "taking names" on the other.

We asked Joe how life up in the city was. And if you
asked me I think somebody stopped tip toeing around
the tulips..... ooooooojoe looke at dem legggggs

Rumble, young man, rumble

If there is one message I can convey to people
out there is this... When flying through the trees
on the road of life. Stop and smell the elephants
with tree trunk noses. Just don't let them smell
back. Leaf up yo fannnnnnies.

oooya friday is once more upon us but unlike
oooya fridays of the days of ole this one is the
predecessor of of an oooya saturday and sunday
thanks to the good people at FBM. Belmar is gonna
be, how you say, "poppin off son."

Krispen is good at things like bike riding. But more
importantly he wont hand a shit to your negative tudes dooooood.

This picture below is not altered which you may or may
not believe. But when push comes to shove... push it up
your but. You can't hit what you can't see. OOOO
rumble young men rumble.

That's your problem now Jim

Flash was nice enough to give ole Tony a ride
on his legs a couple times. What Tony didn't
realize, was that Flash was thinking about that moment
a half hour later instead of the Sheetz hoagie maker.

The elevation of Cambridge in England is 161 ft.
The elevation of this Cambridge in a turn down is
about 161 inches....coincidence?

David Gilmour of Pink Floyd was from Cambridge.
Cambridge was from Cambridges' Mum.
Cambridges' Mum might like Pinnk Floyd.
This is getting flippin erieeeeeeeeeeee.

Are you insane? Your drowning all the time.

Legal mumbo-jumbo, paper trails for dirt trails.
Well I don't know about you but I'm going for
the cheddar. If you get enough necks together we
become stronger then the device trying to kill us.

We asked Abe to comment on the situation and this
is what he had to say...

Janis has been back on the hog after his
knees turned to no's. Where's BeepBop
and RockSteady cause I see a Shredder
aaaaaaaaaaaaaoooooooooyaaaaaaa....um, what?.

Oh yea and before I forget. Cordova sucks
really really bad at sucking. It's nice out
Go do something really stupid. yer gonna die
soon anyway. booty yaka booty yaka blamp.

Musikfest sickmess

The weather finally turned around long enough
for us to take a couple laps and test out Bugbys new
Sex-o-Bot. The robot takes the empy hearted and fills
er bellies with American Ice and a ears full of Buck Cherry.

Hurricane Tony blew into town but instead of letting us
down like those other bastard hurricanes this one is a
breathe of fresh air. Man can he rock.

Tmac apparently reached a level so Bad as Hell Duece has
been questioning the hierarchy of his empire. jjjjjjjjshump.

Hurricane Dolly can kiss my partin

The Definition of insanity is when you do the
same thing, over and over and over and over
again and expect a different result. Wait...
I forgot what I was saying. Oh well... let's
go fix the trails.

Let's face it boys, 95% of the time life can
really suck. Well you know what they say,
If the world is full of apes, quit riding around
on bananas. much munch mmmmmmmmm.

I don't know about you computer nerds but this
one feels it is high time to spend some time in the
woods doing whatever the hell makes life stand
up on her toes and scream "I wanna fuckin party."
(pic:lance-rider:not today buddy)

There is no i in msssspp

She's got hair down to her fanny
She's got a dress slit right up to her panties
Every time she's dancin' she knows what to do
Everybody wants to see, see if she can use it
She's so fine, she's all mine
Girl, you got it right.

Poppy just hasn't been the same since Lance left
everyone send him out some warm lovin.

There was an old gent from Hyde
Who ate rotten apples and died.
The apples fermented
Inside the lamented
And made cider inside his insides.

Now go to the Hub and buy stuff. Keck said
he is saving up for a night of regrets.

Cross those fingers boys.

Today is a very big day for us. Meeting with
the airport and getting it done. So don't go
to the woods or I will poop on you. Flash said
he was going to make good things happen. If they
don't keep it sweet, just click on the pic below to
see the face he will have. (photo:serb)

It was nice to see Will Herman for a second.
Came in. Shredded some pred. Flew out... hard

Bronze Wagon V was this past weekend. Going down
the Delaware with a bunch of pirates to the sound
of Weird Al covering Drop Kick Murphy's song,
drink and drink and drink and drink and float.
ps Meyers is the best thing since leonardo dicaprio
sank a big ass ship.

In unrelated news Lumpy is insane.

And somehow in even more unrelated news Cambridge
is smoother than Rudy Huckstable in a family sing-a-ling.

Who poops in the heart of darkness?
The Phantom Shitter knows. Muah haha ...ha

Standing on top of that building is sweet--Abe

I'm pretty sure that summer weekends are the best thing that ever
existed. This past weekend we had an overdose of being surrounded
by talented sweet dudes. We got together some of the best drinkers
laughers, legends and bike riders out there... put them in some woods
and lived the life. All while listening to FBM's "Dave King and the Rockettes."
They know how to rock.

Lumpy, aka jackhammer, aka that crazy dude who doesn't give a shit is
completely out of control. Do not blink when he is around.

But try and blink a lot when Dead Memories Ryan Hillegas is around.
otherwise you might get some smoke or scrappin in yo eye.